i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
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