Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
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