now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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