glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
