is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize