gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
