I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"