You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize