do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
