Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
