Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I need a beard to bite.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
