Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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