Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
