her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
