Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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