My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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