Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
there is glitter all over my balls
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
