NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize