My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
