god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize