Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
