the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
being pregnant is like rehab
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
