did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!