I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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