Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
