Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize