That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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