I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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