Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
