So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
