The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
It's blow job season.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I think people are normalizing furries
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize