i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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