it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Everyone says I win the strip club
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize