quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
