i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
