he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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