bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
