STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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