i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
