Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
