omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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