Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
