im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
lets start a swedish sibling band together
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Randomize
