I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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