Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
