Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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