Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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