We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
