I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
