No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
