i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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