my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
