You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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